Writing for television
leo's day - Script Writing
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Before beginning todays task, we started the session by looking at how Scripts are created and what makes a good script. We identified that it is essential to have a clear beginning, middle, and end structure, so that the plot follows a clear route. It is also important to use the correct terminology when script writing to reveal more information about the action, characters and dialogue. In order to help us understand how to read and act out a script, we started the session by doing some in-class Improvisation with various scripts. This allowed us to read through some scripts and understand different ways in how they can be interpreted.
For this task, we were given a setting, a head masters office, and two characters, Leo and Mr Briggs, and asked to create an intriguing scenario in the form of a script. We needed to include both lines of dialogue and action in our writing, as well as the key elements of script writing. I have included a copy of my short script below.
“Leos Day”
By
KADEN WHITE
INT. Headmasters office – day
Leo (16), troublesome, destructive, and careless, is being summoned to Mr. BRIGGS, (56) the head teacher, who is short-tempered, structured, and precise.
A large tidy office room, with books placed precisely on the shelf. Mr. BRIGGS is sat at a dark brown desk, straight backed, with his hands clasped in front of him, resting on the desk. There is a big shatter of broken glass removed from the window behind his head.
Suddenly, the door opposite his desk swings open as Leo enters with a confident walk.
Mr. BRIGGS glares at him with deadly eyes.
Suddenly, the door opposite his desk swings open as Leo (16) enters with a confident walk.
Mr. BRIGGS glares at him with deadly eyes.
MR. BRIGGS
Sit down.
Leo stands behind the chair on the other side of the desk and begins to snigger.
MR. BRIGGS
Now.
Mr. Briggs slams his fist onto the desk. There is a moment of silence. His small cactus plant falls on its side due to the force of his hand hitting the table. He takes a breath and stands it back up.
Leo slowly picks up the chair and pretends that he is about to throw it at Mr. Briggs. Mr. Briggs does not flinch as if to imply that they have been in this situation before. Leo slowly backs the chair away, continuing to snigger and smirk, and he places the chair facing the door. He sits down on the chair backwards.
MR. BRIGGS
I don’t know what to say to you.
LEO
Ok, I’ll be off then!
Leo begins to get up out of his chair and walks towards the door.
Almost immediately, Mr. Briggs stands up from his chair and shouts angrily.
MR. BRIGGS
SIT. DOWN.
Leo’s hand touches the door handle as he shouts. There is a moment of pause as Leo contemplates his options. He turns around and returns to his seat, glum faced.
MR. BRIGGS
You promised you would get back on track. After everything we’ve spoken about. Why would you do something like this?
Mr. Briggs and Leo sit back down.
LEO
Like what? I haven’t done anything. I don’t know what you’re talking about.
MR. BRIGGS
You know exactly what I’m talking about.
He slides his chair to the left, revealing the giant crack in the window. Leos facial expression does not change.
LEO
I didn’t do that.
MR. BRIGGS
Don’t lie to me, Leo. I know it was you and –
LEO
Prove it.
Mr. BRIGGS looks startled at the fact that Leo has asked him to prove it.
MR. BRIGGS
Excuse me?
LEO
Prove that I smashed the window.
MR. BRIGGS
I don’t have to prove anything to you. We both know that you smashed the window. You have really gone too far this time.
LEO
I swear, it wasn’t me.
MR. BRIGGS
I’ve heard all your excuses before, and I’ve had enough. I have tried to help you but I there is nothing more I can do!
LEO
I am telling you – it wasn’t me! Surely there is some CCTV or something to prove that I didn’t do it.
MR. BRIGGS
Going by your previous record of incidents like these, I have all the proof I need. And as I said, this time, you have gone too far.
Leo begins to become agitated that Mr. Briggs is not listening to him.
LEO
But I’m telling you-
MR. BRIGGS
I have listened to what you’re telling me, and I don’t want to hear any more of it. I am sorry, Leo, but due to the amount of damage you have caused, I must permanently exclude you from our school.
LEO
No!
MR. BRIGGS
Yes. And on top of this, you and your parents will also be required to pay a fine of £150 pounds to pay for the damage repairs.
LEO
You can’t do this.
MR. BRIGGS
I already have. Please go and collect your things and leave the school site. Your parents will be notified.
LEO
But…
MR. BRIGGS
Goodbye, Leo.
Leo stands up, with his shoulders slumped and leaves the room. A CU of Mr. Briggs opening a drawer in his desk and taking out a large rock. He does an evil smile as though to imply that it was in fact him who smashed the window.
The End.
Overall, I found this script writing task useful in learning the basics of how to successfully write a script. In the future, I will continue to ensure that my script is formatted, making it easier to read.
script writing: character creation
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Character 1:
Bill, who is 102 years old, is the worlds oldest, and longest serving, bus driver. He has worked as a bus driver for 75 years of his life and continues to work every day. Bill is always happy to see his customers and offers them a smile whenever they get onboard. However, despite Bills seemingly positive nature, he is actually quite a lonely man. Bill was married for 65 years of his life, before his wife passed away, and part of the reason why he continues to work is because he enjoys the company and seeing people every day. At this point of Bills life, he is planning to retire at the end of the week, however, when the government offer him a large sum of money to gain some inside information on one of his most loyal customers, he has a big decision to make.
Character 2:
Jill, who is 52 years old, has a rare, one-of-a-kind condition, which means that she snores whilst awake. Jill developed this condition at birth and has lived with it ever since. It can sometimes prove a nuisance when working, as Jill works as a Librarian. She loves reading and is a classic bookworm, however, she often feels embarrassed when working in a quiet environment as she feels her loud snoring distracts everybody around her. When at work one day, her constant snoring nose is as a loud as ever, however, all of a sudden, there is silence. Jills snoring has suddenly stopped, and everybody around her is shocked, including Jill, who has lived with this for all her life.
“My Script”
By
Kaden White
Fade In:
Int. A bright, spacious office, day.
Mrs. West (50s) is sat behind a desk, with her head down, writing on multiple pieces of paper.
Max (30s), calamitous, and innocently disruptive, swings open the door and falls into the room, as though he was leaning on the door as it opened.
Mrs. West hears him enter but does not look up.
MRS. WEST
Ah. You must be Max. Thank you so much for coming today. Sorry to have kept you waiting. Please do hang your coat up.
She gestures her hand at a wooden coat stand in the corner of the room.
MAX
Oh, yes. Thank You.
Max hangs his coat up and goes to take a seat, he is unaware that his shirt is caught up in his coat zip, and he is still attached to the coat. As he reaches for the chair, the coat stand falls and hits him on the back of the head. He frantically stands it back up. Mrs. West doesn’t notice and still does not lift her head.
MRS. WEST
Oh, sorry Max, before you sit down, could you just grab me a new pen out of that draw over there. I think this one is about to run out and I really need to finish this paperwork quickly.
MAX
Absolutely, no problem.
MRS. WEST
Thank You.
Max opens the draw, rummages around, and grabs a pen. As he goes to shut the draw, he slams his fingers in the draw.
MAX
Ah!
He lets out a distressing sound.
MRS. WEST
(Confusing His Yelp for A Sound of Joy) Ah! I take it you’ve found one! I’m so sorry, I admit, I don’t keep that draw very tidy. It can be a nuisance to find things in there.
MAX
Oh no. Its no trouble at all.
Mrs. West still does not lift her head. Max places the pen on the table and goes to take a seat.
MRS. WEST
(LOUDLY) Now.
Startled by Mrs. Wests raise in volume, max tips backwards on the chair and land on his back. Mrs. West finally raises her head.
MRS. WEST
Tell me Max – Oh. Where have you gone?
She looks around the room, baffled. Max lies helplessly on the floor.
MAX
I’ll be with you in two seconds.
Mrs. West stands up and glances over the desk.
MRS. WEST
Oh, there you are. What on earth are you doing down there?
MAX
I was just admiring your carpet, actually. Its such a lovely shade of red. I was thinking about getting something like this for my living room.
Mrs. West is taken aback and confused.
MRS. WEST
Ah, yes. Thank You. I like to think of it as a maroon sort of colour.
Beat.
MRS. WEST (CONT.)
Please, would you join me back up at the desk?
She gestures at the chair.
MAX
Oh, yes. Absolutely. Sorry.
MRS. WEST
Now, I must apologize for my poor welcoming when you arrived. I’ve been at a tight schedule all day and I really had to get all of this paperwork completed and signed off.
MAX
Its no problem, honestly. Important stuff, is it?
MRS. WEST
Exactly That.
Max smiles, still slightly flustered from the previous misfortunate events.
MRS. WEST
Right, let’s try this again, shall we? I’m Mrs. West, Thank You for coming, Max.
MAX
Thank You for having me. I am very happy to be here, and I really hope that I can prove I am worthy for this job.
MRS. WEST
Well, it is a pleasure to meet you Max. And, yes, I hope so too. Let’s get started with this interview then, shall we?
She gestures out to shake his hand. He does so, knocking a glass of water over onto all of the important papers as he does. They both share a mortified look.
Beat.
MRS. WEST
(Expressionless) Get Out.
MAX
Thank You for your time.
Max nods and quickly leaves the room.
Beat.
He returns and grabs his coat from the coat stand where he has yet another difficult encounter. He finally untangles his coat and leaves, awkwardly.
The End.
Script rehearsal and feedback
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For todays ‘Writing for Television’ task, we finalised our scripts and began to rehearse in preparation for next week’s filming task. In turn, we all shared our scripts with others in our class as the writer took on the role of Director and the others acting out the characters in the script. After acting out our scripts several times, the director would stop the actors and give notes, with the actors also giving feedback on the scripts themselves. When directing actors who were performing my own script, I wanted to make sure that the physical element of the acting was prominent. My script relies heavily on exaggerated body movements and gestures in moving the action forward, therefore, this was essential in being able to portray the comedy element in my piece. During the first run through, the actors did a simple read-through, with very little action or movement. When discussing with the actors afterwards, I made sure to explain to them the reasoning and importance behind why further action was needed. During the second run through, it became more apparent that the actors were using more movements and using the space to enhance their performance, however, the comedy element was still lacking. In order to improve this, I encouraged them to think about how they might be portraying comedy when performing and whether they themselves would find it funny.
I found this task particularly useful as it allowed me to understand the qualities needed to be a successful director, and I feel that this knowledge will help me next week when working with actors.
BBC Writers Room Script Analysis
Motherland : Motherland SHOOTING SCRIPT 1st April Script (bbc.co.uk)
When analysing the pilot script for the BBC Comedy, Motherland, there are several aspects of scriptwriting that I found interesting. One of which is the opening few lines of the script. When writing my own scripts, I knew that it is important to include a brief description, outlining the plot, characters and setting, however, this script has given me an insight into how much description to include. It is important to include enough descriptions to portray the scene you are trying to create, however, only include the information that is necessary to be portrayed in this moment. For example, it will not prove useful to include a few lines of description that is actually highlighted more at a further point in the script. Another thing that I noticed about the first few lines of this script, is that key words are highlighted in all capitals to emphasise its importance to the actors and the director. For example, in this script, the line, ‘Suddenly a car ROARS around the corner, destroying the peace completely’, the word ‘Roar’ is emphasised to highlight that this moment must be emphasised to further the storytelling and help the plot progress. From reading the first page of this script, it is obvious that the plot follows a group of stressed and unorganised parents, trying to control their busy lives. There is an equal balance of dialogue and actions, which allow for the storyline to develop smoothly. When each character is introduced, a brief description is included, explaining each of their traits and appearances. For example, Julia is described as ‘early-40’s, stylishly dressed, and desperately brushing her morning hair with a tangle teaser’. This immediately gives a brief understanding of Julia’s appearance, allowing the viewer to predict and understand her personality and the situation she is in. When reading this script, I now understand the equal importance of action descriptions, as well as dialogue, as it helps to enhance the narrative of the plot. A particular line of dialogue that stood out to me was this line, spoken by the only male parent, Kevin, ‘Great. Let me know your thoughts. You all have my phone number, don’t you? I did put that on my last email so everyone should have it. Did everyone get my last email? It had the subject line ‘URGENT’? Maybe—'. The short, snappy lines of dialogue that have been used here help to reflect the characters personality. He is often portrayed as being socially awkward and the way in which this line of dialogue is structed helps to enhance that trait. One element that I particularly like about this script is that every action is included, making the script feel more realistic and imaginable to read. I will intend to use this technique when writing my own scripts in the future.
Death In Paradise : DIP6 Episode 5 YELLOW SHOOTING SCRIPT 22.07.16.fdx (bbc.co.uk)
When analysing a script from series six of the BBC Murder Drama, Death In Paradise, there are several aspects of script writing that I found particularly interesting. One aspect about the script that stood out to me was the contrast between the dialogue and the action. Unlike the Motherland script, there is not an equal balance of each in this script. However, there is more lines of action, in comparison to dialogue. This is understandable for multiple different reasons, one being that the genre of this script is Drama, whereas the other one was Comedy. Also, in this script, the programme relies heavily on action to move the plot forward. An interesting aspect of this script is that each script in this series follows a different plot line, therefore, each episode, a new situation is introduced. In order to avoid confusion between the different plot lines, each episode begins with the new plot being introduced, for example, the murder, followed by the opening titles, and then allowing the rest of the episode to continue. By playing the opening titles in between the opening piece of action and the rest of the episode, it allows the viewer to clearly establish the main plot line of this particular episode, eliminating any attachment that they might have had to the previous episode. Another element of this script that compares to most other scripts is the lack of character description at the beginning of the script. In fact, in this particular script, only the setting and situation is introduced, with no information being revealed about the characters. I believe that this was a conscious decision due to the nature of the programme. Each program revolves around the viewer uncovering the true identities of the characters alongside the detectives, therefore, in most cases, it is important for their personalities and motives remain hidden at the beginning of the episode to prevent the ending from being predictable. A section of the script that I like is as follows;
"Florence dashes to Frank’s side - and takes his pulse.
FLORENCE
He’s dead...
Humphrey looks from Frank to Dominic, Martin and Steve... And
then to Jack. Both of them stunned.
CAPTION: “TO BE CONTINUED..."
By ending an episode with a ‘To Be Continued’ title, this keeps the viewer interested in the action and will encourage them to continue watching next time. This technique would be something that I would like to experiment using in the future. However, in order for this to work effectively, it is important to end the programme with a suitable cliff-hanger that will keep the viewer engaged.
Dialogue Analysis
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After Life : ‘There are angels’ - After Life - ''There are angels'' Scene #AfterLife - YouTube
In this emotional scene from the comedy, After Life, I found that the dialogue was particularly encaptivating for the viewer. The plot of After Life follows a man, Tony, who is struggling to overcome his grief for his wife, Lisa, and the journey that he takes to find happiness again. In this scene, where the viewers are introduced to Tony and fellow widower, Anne, there is a clear difference between each of the characters' stages of grief - this is highlighted in their dialogue. For the most part of this scene, there is an unequal balance of dialogue between the characters, with the most prominent character being Anne. The tone in which the actor uses immediately informs the viewer of her stage in the grieving process. Her upbeat and cheery lines of dialogue allow the viewer to understand that she has experienced the same or similar feelings as to what Tony feels at this moment, but has been able to overcome this over time. In her line, “If you want to be an angel, you’ve got to do it when you're alive, be good, do good things.”, the emotional depth of this scene is revealed to the viewer, encouraging them to question their own ways of life. This is a powerful tool that enables the viewer to reflect upon their own actions. Also, another aspect of this scene that stood out to me was the frequent pause between every few lines. Usually, in most pieces of dialogue, there are pauses between each character, however, in this scene, the pauses occur whilst only one character is speaking. This method may have been used to ensure that the viewer concentrates carefully on the words that are being spoken, and further encourages them to question their resonance with their own lives. The enthralling monologue uses dialogue to portray true emotion through the scene, which is something that I would like to explore further when writing my own dialogue.
Mrs Doubtfire : ‘I do voices’ - Mrs. Doubtfire | "I Do Voices" Clip | Fox Family Entertainment - YouTube
In this scene from the comedy film, Mrs Doubtfire, I found that the quick, snappy dialogue entices the viewer into the action happening on screen. The plot of this particular scene follows a man who is desperately trying to organize his life, in order to see his children after going through a divorce. The main thing that sticks out to me about this scene is the difference between the genre of the narrative, and the genre in which the scene is portrayed through the characters acting. By using clever dialogue, the dull and depressing situation is paired with an upbeat and confident atmosphere. Also in this scene, the dialogue reveals a lot of information about the characters' personalities to the viewer. The interviewer, Mrs Sellner, portrays her dialogue slow and steady, and through a tight lip. Whereas, Daniel, portrayed by Robin Williams, speaks his dialogue with a more frantic and chaotic tone. This immediately invites the viewer to understand more about the characters feelings and thoughts in this situation. Also, the strong contrast between the two characters' personalities enhances the comedic aspect of this scene. The amount of dialogue that each character speaks can also reveal the characters wants and needs. For example, in this scene, Daniel has the most lines of dialogue in comparison to Mrs Sellner. This could have been done to emphasize the characters strong desire to see his children and show the viewer how much it means to him. This is a clever aspect that I will consider using when writing my own dialogue and deciding on each characters intentions.
Script Directing
WRITING FOR TELEVISION - EVALUATION
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Over the past trimester, I have particularly enjoyed working on the 'Writing for Television' Unit and feel that I have developed some useful skills. When joining the course, I had hoped to learn more about the skills and techniques needed to write a successful screenplay, and, after completing this unit, I feel that I have gained those skills and have a greater understanding of the topic.
When beginning the final project for this unit, it was important to consistently refer back to what we had previously learnt. For example, how to create and develop ideas, and how to successfully format a script. When writing my script, it was important to have a clear balance of dialogue and action to ensure that the scene flowed smoothly. My original intention for my final script was to create a comedic scene with elements of slapstick. It was essential that I referred back to this idea in my script, because the scene was very action heavy. Most of the comedy was portrayed through action, instead of dialogue, so it was important to note this in the script, because these aspects could be overlooked and misinterpreted if the script was being directed by someone else. Furthermore, I feel that I was able to use the professional conventions of script writing in my own script, such as starting each new scene description with either 'INT' for interior, or 'EXT' for exterior, and starting a new line for each line of dialogue. By doing this, my script was able to resemble the layout of a professional screenplay. It is also important to consider your target audience when writing scripts. For example, if you were to write a script for an infant television show, you would use short, simplistic dialogue, and rely more so on the visual action. However, if you were to write a drama series for an older audience, you could use longer, complex dialogue. The Target Audience for my script had a wide age range, as, when conducting research, I found that a large variety of people are able to enjoy slapstick comedies, but if I was to narrow down my Target Audience, it would mainly be aimed at younger people.
If I was to complete this task again, I would like to build on my script as a whole. I would create more interesting characters and build on the scenario and dialogue. However, I have enjoyed studying the Writing for Television unit and feel that it will prove to be very useful in my future work.